This is me NOT winning

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I have bought a total of 5 lottery tickets in my life.  And all five of those have been in the last couple years.  I am not morally opposed to the process of the lotto.  Since it hasn’t been an issue for me, I couldn’t tell you what the bible says about it.  I could tell you what many Christians say about it, but I like to get my source straight from the Word. I do think that anything that controls you, is wrong.

And the last two lotto tickets I have bought- have done just that. They have consumed my mind with all of these amazing things I could do with the money.  I knew the odds were slim. I knew that I didn’t feel God giving me any numbers. But, I knew that the price tag of $500,000,000 was just such a beautiful temptation.  So, I bought a ticket. And then I spent a lot of my time dreaming and planning about the money.  My thoughts were consumed (still are a little, as I have a powerball ticket that is getting drawn tonight) on what I would do.  The more I thought about it, the more disappointing my current status became.  Man, I only make X-thousands per month now…but if I could spend XXX-thousand per month…man…life would be good.

No.  Life already IS good.  We have come to a place where our X-thousands a month is better than X-hundreds we used to live off a month.  My girls are great. My friends are good.  My husband is amazing.  My God is simply the best.  My life IS good.  There are many things that can be improved, but with a little discipline and faith in God, they can be improved without hundreds of millions of dollars.

I kept justifying my obsessive thoughts with all the good I would/could do.  Then God kind of reminded me that I could and should do good now.  Don’t get me wrong, I do good now.  But, the question is always- do I do enough?  Money, while it helps, is not the only thing people need.  They need validation, acceptance, love, God’s forgiveness, a ride so they don’t have to walk, a fan to help cool them off in this heat, a person to be their friend even when they don’t deserve a friend.

I didn’t win the lottery. My bank account is not swelling with millions of dollars.  And while I could focus on how disappointing that is, I think I will dwell on Phil 4:8.

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